Friday, March 28, 2008


"At one point an employee, a little fluffy white dog trailing at her heels, walked through and headed into the kitchen that was next to the waiting room. She apologized—not for my having to wait but for interrupting my waiting—and explained, “I need to prepare something for Mr. Richards.”

She opened the freezer, cracked some ice cubes into one of those red plastic Solo cups, and filled it to the brim with Ketel One." GQ visits Keith Richards (at his office, which sounds awesome.)

"I’d be remiss if I did not interrupt here to tell you briefly about how Keith speaks. It’s not speaking, actually. Or at least not what you think of as speaking. It’s more of a slur-mumble. Words run together and then get coated in cigarette smoke and that thick accent. It makes you wish he provided his own subtitles. I mean, when I transcribed the tapes from this interview, I had to listen to each sentence maybe three times to decode it. Further complicating matters was the incessant ambient noise: the clatter of the ice cubes as he swirled his drink between sips. "

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Tips on how to tie your shoes.

Thursday, March 20, 2008


Increasingly it seems like everyone is getting in on the joke. I can't put my finger on why it's hilarious exactly (although I like the quip about "If you're selling leather bags, why not hire one, too?"), but the notion of Keef hawking Louis Vuitton is just the sort of lift my day needed. You just know that Mick is thinking, "Why didn't they ask me?"

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Thoughts on the NCAA Tournament:

Mount St. Mary's vs. Coppin State. I thought about going to the Mount, back in the day, so I like them better than Coppin State, which I've never heard of.

Indiana vs. Arkansas. EGA attends Indiana. If the Hoosiers make it to the round of 16 she might notice, so naturally I'll be pulling for them/

Notre Dame vs. George Mason. Tough call. A school from the South vs. Mother Church. I'll go with Mason, and hope they are knocked off in the next round.

Washington State vs. Winthrop. I forget-- are Washington State the Huskies? No? Cougars? Okay, Cougars over the Winthrop Eagles-- Cougars were my high school mascot.

Tennessee vs. American. I kinda like Tennessee, but A's nephew goes to American, so I'll go with the AU Eagles. Why not?

Butler vs. South Alabama. Bulldogs vs. Jaguars. When you put it that way, who wouldn't take South Alabama, even though it seems somewhat redundantly named. Aren't "South" and "Alabama" synonymous?

Louisville vs. Boise State. It's a shame that Louisville doesn't call its teams "The Sluggers" but the home of the Hot Brown gets my vote.

Oklahoma vs. Saint Joseph's. I gotta pick a Catholic school somewhere, so why not here? I feel bad for Oklahoma, which has to live next door to Texas, but St. Joseph's has that cool Hawk will never die thing, and I like college sports that do stuff like that. Oklahoma is a football school.

Kansas vs. Portland State. The Jayhawks are named for guerrilla fighters during the Civil War who often clashed with pro-slavery partisans and as Missouri militia units. I like the chances of Jayhawkers over Vikings. Who'd Vikings ever beat? Irishmen? Please.

UNLV vs. Kent State. It's been a while for UNLV hasn't it? Back in the day they were practically an NBA team. When Neil Young writes a song about them I'll root for them.

Clemson vs. Villanova. I was wait-listed at 'Nova. Screw them.

Vanderbilt (26-7) vs. No. 13 Siena. Thought about going to Siena, and wrote quite a few papers in their library over Thanksgivings when I was an undergrad-- it was down the road from my Aunt Joan and Uncle Fred. Vandy wait-listed me for law school, but I gotta go with the Commodores. I wish that they'd automatically nickname the team captain "Lionel Ritchie-- that's be a fine tradition, even though the actual Commodores went to the Tuskegee Institute.

Georgetown vs. UMBC. You really shouldn't be allowed to refer to yourself by your initials unless it is clear what they stand for. I had to look up UMBC, but I hate Georgetown. I have friends in Baltimore, and the whole thing is moot because neither will advance.

Gonzaga vs. Davidson. When Bing Crosby went to Gonzaga the Dean of Academics pulled him aside and told him he was worried about Bing's Chemistry grade. "Well Father, I don't see tha we both need to worry about it," Crosby said. I like the Zags.

Wisconsin vs. Cal State Fullerton. I liked Madison when I visited. Go Badgers!

Southern California vs. Kansas State. Strictly because I'd prefer to see more of the SC cheerleaders.

Memphis vs. Texas Arlington. "Home of Elvis and the ancient Greeks" vs the home of my least favorite airport? Please.

Mississippi State vs. Oregon. I like the Ducks. Maybe Nike has some kind of special sneakers with Flubber for them.

Michigan State vs. Temple. Temple is in Philly, and I like Philly. Also, Michigan State is a big Ten School that I root against. Big Ten Schools I like are Indiana (see above), Michigan (my brother went there) and Northwestern (traditionally lousy).

Pitt vs. Oral Roberts. Anybody who'd go to Oral Roberts-- even for free-- is beneath contempt. Seriously, my bitch about college sports is that they tend to de-emphasize academics. A college where they teach that Jesus hunted dinosaurs is too much for me to bear.

Texas vs. Austin Peay. Austin Peay is one of those scrappy underdogs that this tournament is supposed to be all about, right? Okay, I'm down with that.

Miami (Fla.) vs. Saint Mary's. What do you bet Miami (Ohio) just calls itself that to piss off the Miami that is someplace nice? That's the St. Mary's in Texas, isn't it? I'll take (Fla).

Stanford vs. Cornell. If Eliot Spitzer has taught us anything, it is that sometimes the jokes write themselves. I'll resist, and pick Big Red over the Cardinal, out of loyalty to the Empire State.

Marquette vs. Kentucky. Beats me. Kentucky has the worst graduation rate of jsut about any state university, so that's got to count for something. I'll take the SEC team here.

UCLA vs. Mississippi Valley State. Go Bruins!

BYU vs. Texas A&M. Among the reasons I hate BYU is the fact that it should stand for "Bring Your..." but it is a Mormon school, so you can't. It hasn't been a good year for the LDS church, so I like the Aggies.

Drake vs. Western Kentucky. TKM went to Drake. He hated it, but too bad.

Connecticut vs. San Diego. UConn really wanted EGA to go there, and I love them for that. I don't know why the hoops powers were so avid about her scholarship, but I'm solid with the schools that felt that way.

Duke vs. Belmont. Hate Duke. Just do. Who is Belmont? I assume it is different from the race track, but since I'm not sure, the Blue Devils are the safe pick.

West Virginia vs. Arizona. CLA likes the Mountain State, so I do too.

Xavier vs. Georgia. No way the Bulldogs can beat the X Men from Xavier's school.

Purdue vs. Baylor. If EGA followed this stuff at all, she'd hate the Boilermakers, so I do too.

Tuesday, March 04, 2008


Words fail me.

Monday, March 03, 2008

I'm a little rueful about missing the Shamrock this year, but there was too much else on my plate to justify it. Over at the Buffalo Runner's thread about the race someone reports that Score-This was collecting chips outside the beer tent. Apparently about two dozen runners decided 'the hell with it' and skipped the Longest Mile in Buffalo Sports. There have been plenty of times I've run by the Malamute and thought about skipping the whole damn thing.

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